She woke up to the whirring of the stand fan. It was too humid. She looked up and the clock says 10 to 5. She knows it is 4.30 because she purposely set it half an hour fast. Now it doesn’t matter because she will always turn it back 30 minutes in her head. But at least it is useful to scare her children sometimes when they forget.
She has always craved for balance, for routine. She tried and it will fail to the point that she doesn’t bother. It will either be because money is insufficient that the children can’t go to school or..well it has always been about money. She thinks of her friend Rubini. Suffering from the whiteman’s ailment of Multiple Sclerosis..but she has everything planned out to a T. Her house is impeccably neat, afluent background, a wonderful husband high up in the corporate echelons. But she gives me the time of her day. I love her and it has been a while since they kePT in touch.
Ahh i digress. She got up at 4.30 went to the bathroom to ease herself and thought, ahh time to be on her own to watch the sun rise. But hell, wonder what the kitchen and the living is like. Sloth overcame her..and she slid in between the sheets again and let the whirring sound of the stand fan lull her to sleep. Bulan yet again let time slip through her dainty fingers, as she promised that today she would meditate, go for a run with her pregnant daughter and then organise the house and sit to do her writing. Another few hours slipped past her in oblivion...when will she stop.
She wants so badly to be a writer. She sees that is her way out. Tor write her story..people say it is quite extraordinary. But she isn’t sure..the demon that has long lived in her veins told her otherwise. How are u going to hide your shame. The horrible things you have done, the wrong way you raised your chidlren...all sorts of EXCUSES.
S0 maybe today things will be a little different. Maybe today can be a start. Today, she will begin her routine..the laundry, the rest the cooking the cleaning. She will write her wishes her dreams so it will crystalise. She will love and be grateful and she will write and write and write
